North Korean Unicorns Discovered

Kim Jong UnicornActually, their presence has merely been reconfirmed.

The Korean Central News Agency has just reported that archaeologists have found a unicorn lair in Pyongyang belonging to King Tongmyong. How did they know it was a unicorn lair?  According to the news agency:

“A rectangular rock carved with words “Unicorn Lair” stands in front of the lair.”

Pretty impressive, but worthy of the Central News Agency’s time? Of course, there’s more. The report continues:

“The discovery of the unicorn lair, associated with legend about King Tongmyong, proves that Pyongyang was a capital city of Ancient Korea as well as Koguryo Kingdom.”

It’s important to note here that although the Korean peninsula is divided now, it’s not the first time in history that this has been the case. From 57 CE to 668 CE, the Korean peninsula was dominated by three powers (GoguryeoBaekje and Silla) which is why the period is called the Three Kingdoms Period. Silla defeated Goguryeo in 668, ushering in the Period of the North South States – sound familiar?

With the discovery of the unicorn lair, the DPRK government is now confident that the rest of the world (why translate it into English otherwise?) will see that the North Korean capital is the rightful capital of a unified Korea. Well then, I guess it’s settled.

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